October 20, 2003
On a recent week-long sojourn through Northern Ontario I had the opportunity to become intimately acquainted with our national broadcaster. I use the word "intimately" in the sense that it applies to certain situations that are not entirely pleasant, nor are they wished for. But given the circumstances, the CBC was the only game in town, unless I cared to listen to radio stations from Duluth or Minneapolis.
The programming that was aired was so out of touch with what Northern Ontario was all about, that at times I thought I was listening to a Monty Python skit.
Picture this: interminable stretches of highway bordered on each side with dark, impenetrable woods broken only by the odd swamp, lake or granite formation; populated areas wherein people live in small white clapboard bungalows with tiny windows and where the most ambitious buildings are government offices and the LCBO; Industry that consists largely of logging or mining, employing the roughest, toughest, hardest-drinking types you’ve ever met.
Yet the Canadian radio programs the residents of Northern Ontario are forced to listen to sound like they are from another planet. They include arcane discussions on the arts, Programs originating from Prague in the Czech Republic celebrating famous Czech composers, in-depth reports on rioting between Hindus and Muslims in India, as well as the interminably smug commentary on how the Americans are screwing up the world. Add to this a sense of effete snobbery, and that pretty well sums up the CBC’s Northern Ontario presence.
No wonder the alcoholism and suicide rate in Northern Ontario is many times higher than the national average! Long cold winters with endless months of little or no sunshine, almost no recreational amenities other than skidoo riding and drinking and radio programming that describes the correct form for executing a perfect plié by very soft, effeminate sounding men with British accents are the staple of everyday life. They don’t even give an accurate weather report! What’s wrong with this picture?
It seems to me that the CBC is a microcosm of all that is wrong with this country: the profligate waste, the conceit that we are making a real difference in the world, the pretensions and delusions of grandeur and most sadly, the utter irrelevance of anything relating to gritty, life-sized reality.
I now understand why so many Northern Ontarians choose to listen to American radio stations originating in places like Cheboygan or Grand Portage. Their programming appears to be grounded in the real world, rather than the delusional twilight zone of that Ivory Tower known as the CBC. The sooner we elect a government that has the guts to close them down, the better off all of Canada will be.