Great news! North Korea claims to have cured SARS, MERS, Ebola and HIV/AIDS!

In North Korea, everything is wonderful. Their glorious leaders don't feel the need to defecate. This frees up time, allowing them to hold world record golf-scores, breed enormous rabbits capable of feeding the entire world, and control the planet's weather. Still, there’s always work to be done. Earth cries out for relief from disease and the Norks have decided to answer the call.

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Kim Jong Un and his team of super-scientists claim they’ve developed an amazing super-drug that will obliterate MERS, SARS, Ebola, and HIV/AIDS. As the AP reports:

The authoritarian, impoverished nation better known for pursuing a nuclear program despite global criticism announced Friday it has a drug can prevent and cure MERS, Ebola, SARS and AIDS. The secretive state did not provide proof, and the claim is likely to provoke widespread skepticism. The official Korean Central News Agency said scientists developed Kumdang-2 from ginseng grown from fertilizer mixed with rare-earth elements. According to the pro-North Korea website Minjok Tongshin, the drug was originally produced in 1996. "Malicious virus infections like SARS, Ebola and MERS are diseases that are related to immune systems, so they can be easily treated by Kumdang-2 injection drug, which is a strong immune reviver," KCNA said.

There's no word on what might be in "Kumdang-2" but, considering that Kim Jong Il claimed to prolong his life via injections of female virgin blood, the drug's ability to "provoke widespread skepticism" is probably an understatement. Joking aside, the ugly thing here is that Kim Jong Un has decided to prey upon an entire world of sick people for ...something. We're used to his goofy claims, but usually, we can find a motive. We're not really sure what he's thinks he's going to gain from this one. We do know that there's a whole planet full of terminally-ill people, most of whom are far less "media savvy" than those of us in the West, who are desperately searching for any sign of hope as they face their illnesses. The fact that Jong-Un is willing to exploit that for some kind of ridiculous propaganda ploy? Pure evil. But then, I guess we're used to that from tin-pot communists.