WhatFinger

Call Mulder and Scully, Hillary has a job opening

Hillary promises to investigate aliens if elected - the ones from space, not Mexico


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By —— Bio and Archives January 4, 2016

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The United States is facing a lot of problems these days. We've got Islamic terrorism, mass shootings, hundreds of thousands of illegals flooding across our southern border, and an out-of-control federal government drowning in debt. We also, apparently, have concerns about aliens. No, we're not talking about families wandering in from Tijuana, we're talking about little green men who come to Earth to slaughter our cattle and probe us in our sleep. Don't worry, though. Hillary Clinton is aware of your concerns and - if elected president - she's going to "get to the bottom" of the government's UFO cover-up. She made the announecment during a pow wow with the editorial board of New Hampshire's Conway Daily Sun.
During the meeting, the former first lady, former senator from New York and secretary of state answered serious questions about foreign policy and the economy, and at the end, she chatted with this reporter, who had asked her about UFOs the last time she visited. She recalled that 2007 exchange with a smile and seemed to have fun discussing the topic. "Yes, I'm going to get to the bottom of it," said Clinton with enthusiasm. Back in 2007, Clinton had said that the No. 1 topic of freedom-of-information requests that her husband, former President Bill Clinton, received at his library was UFOs.
Bill Clinton once famously said he believed that aliens existed somewhere in the Universe, and he hoped humanity's first interaction with them would peaceful - or as he put it, "not like Independence Day."
When asked about her husband's nonchalant comment about contact with the third kind, Hillary Clinton responded: "I think we may have been (visited already). We don't know for sure." Clinton also said she would like to look into Area 51, a secret military base in Nevada that has long been rumored to contain aliens. At first, she called it Area 54 and then corrected herself.
Phew. I feel safer already. Here I was, thinking that the next President should spend their time killing ISIS goons and fixing the VA, or devising a better set of mental health policies. I was totally overlooking the space-alien dilemma. ...And yes, I get that she's half-joking. But remember, longtime UFO enthusiast John Podesta is the chairman of Hillary's 2016 campaign. On his last day at the White House, Podesta famously tweeted: "Finally, my biggest failure of 2014: Once again not securing the #disclosure of the UFO files." Now it looks like he's made it clear that, politically speaking, "aliens" are where it's at. He seems pretty excited that Hillary will be getting to the truth about Area 51. Joke or not, I think we'll all rest easier knowing that grownups like these are back in charge, right?



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