WhatFinger


Do it for the Children: Effective immediately, I hereby resign!

With Just Five Words, Obama Can Create Millions of Jobs!



-Satire When Barack Obama speaks before a joint session of Congress next week to present his latest “plan” for circumventing the unemployment curse which he owns, he is likely to regurgitate many of the same, old tired themes which have failed time and time again over the past three years.
Key words to look for include stimulus, balance, taxes, fees, training, fundamental fairness, infrastructure, bank, redistribution, disadvantaged, filthy rich, and fair share. Inclusion of any of these words in Obama’s blathering means only one thing: Hold onto to your wallets because Obama has your wealth in his cross hairs! Nothing this president has done or proposed to do involves a pro-business, pro-capitalism, free market idea.

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In Obama’s world, everything involves bigger and more intrusive government and the obligatory taxes to pay for that government interference. He knows no other way. Hard work and dedication are non- starters in the heart of this unrepentant Marxist who hates free enterprise because it discriminates against the slothful and unimaginative! Although there is little to no hope for Obama, one can still offer helpful hints in the off chance that a sliver of sunshine might slither through the dark windows of the Oval Office and end up in The One’s speech. Five little words expressed with sincerity and honesty could go a long way toward restoring civility and economic sanity to America while producing untold millions of jobs for desperate Americans. The five words, Mr. President: Effective immediately, I hereby resign! Say those five words, Mr. President, and watch the stock market soar like crazy. Business people from coast-to-coast would race to get “HELP WANTED” ads placed as soon as possible. And Joe Biden, upon ascension to the throne of Obama, would declare, “Our national nightmare is over.” America would begin to heal, the economy would prosper and the GOP would win the presidency in 2012 and take back the US Senate while improving its majority in the House. All across America, citizens of all colors, faiths, and ideologies would join in declaring, “God Bless Barack Obama!” Just five little words, Mr. President, and you can retire to a life of luxury, leisure, and uninterrupted golf. Go ahead and say it—with a week to practice you may not even need your teleprompter. Do it for the children, and the children’s children, and the children’s children children, and on and on!


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John Lillpop -- Bio and Archives

John W. Lillpop is a recovering liberal. “Clean and sober” since 1992 when last he voted for a Democrat. For years, John lived in the San Francisco Bay Area, the very liberal sanctuary city which protects, rather than prosecutes, certain favored criminals.  John escaped the Bay Area in May and now lives in Pine Grove California where conservative values are still in vogue.

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