London, England-Foreigners still tend to think of England as a land where everyone talks like Sir Alec Guinness circa 1950, exemplifying the most impeccable manners in decorum, tea drinking and conversation - usually in the rain and being beautifully turned out in Harris Tweed. HA!- you wish! Tourists who actually arrive on our shores are far more likely to run into an unintelligible ‘regional ‘accent ( think of the short lived Cheryl Cole from X Factor USA that no one could understand and hence was fired), inconsiderate behaviour and coffee bars full of people wearing jeans and t-shirts that look like they haven’t seen the inside of a washing machine for months.
Sartorial splendour is running a dangerous risk of becoming extinct as the folks at Ascot racecourse have noticed. The course is owned by the Queen and she appears for a few days each June to watch her favourite sport. It’s a glam affair where everyone dresses to the nines, sips champagne and the ladies attempts to outdo one another with the most spectacular hats. Think Audrey Hepburn in
My Fair Lady decked out in her wide hat and elaborate lace gown. The gowns have gotten shorter and the hats sillier, so much so that the management have felt compelled to introduce a new dress code –dresses just above the knee or longer, with shoulder straps of one inch or more. No strapless, off the shoulder, or halter necklines and midriffs must be covered. A headpiece must have a base of 4 inches as an alternative to a hat which must be worn. For the gents, a suit must have a matching jacket and trousers and no shorts. In the Royal enclosure they must wear black or grey morning dress to include a waistcoat and tie. Think Eliza Doolittle’s dad on his wedding day in
My Fair lady. No pink top hats or swans on fedoras – yes it has happened.
It may sound like school uniforms, but the culture here has become so relaxed and self centred that just about anything goes – quite literally. I saw one woman whose strapless dress was so low, people were taking bets on when we would all be treated to an eye-popping exposé of her natural talents.
Then there are the ‘Essex Girls’ - equivalent to Jersey shore types. They sport make up you could scrape off with a palette knife and pneumatic, bronzed bosoms squeezed into skin tight almost-a-dress affairs that makes Julia Robert’s prostitute in Pretty Woman (before the do over) look positively angelic.
But despite the fashion police or ‘dress code assistants’ hired by Ascot and armed with baskets of pashminas, hats, ties and other assorted attire to help out the fashion challenged, the die-hards still tried it on in this, the first year of the dress code.
Perhaps to spite the strap rule which is meant to cover up bra straps, many bras were simply left at home. In our unseasonal cold snap, this led to a new spectator sport in addition to the spectacle of the horses.
The hat base rule is meant to discourage the ridiculous “statement hats” that have in the past included everything from birdcages and giant pickles to IPads, but failed miserably because it doesn’t matter what the base width is, one can still manage to get a full English breakfast, a cream tea or a giant Olympic torch through on top of the head as they did this year. Some of these creations are so complex and huge, it would take the physical discipline of a Las Vegas showgirl to get the balance right – except that they would look more elegant.
As for skirt length, more than one fake-tanned thigh made it through because of the good taste of their general appearance, which is where this is all going. A spokeswoman for Ascot has warned that the rules will be enforced with more rigor next year. This year was simply a warm up exercise in enforced decorum.
This whole Ascot hoopla is all about taste, which is based in cultural norms that define what is beautiful, good and proper. Much of this stems from class structure, especially in Britain whose social history is a story of the serfs breaking free from the bondage of the nobility. In general terms as the middle class emerged, sartorial aspirations were still focused on what style the upper classes set and wore. This was also set against what was considered decent and proper, or an aspect of morality in which religion played a great part.
But all that is over. Morals and decency are for our great grandparents. It’s now all about me, me and did I mention me? Self expression is the rule and to heck with anyone if they don’t like it. Liberal sexual morals have loosened what is considered to be decent. In a wannabe world that values what Kim Kardashian wears over what comes out of her mouth, pushing one’s sexuality has become the be-all and end-all in fashion. What was an under slip in my mother’s generation is now a cocktail dress. Strapless gowns used to be about a style in evening dress, now it’s about pushing up the surgically enhanced bosom to the point where the implant edge is clearly visible against the natural chest.
What Ascot is trying to do is bring women back to being ladylike. Think Grace Kelly’s strapless blue chiffon gown in
To Catch a Thief versus Ms Kardashian in just about anything. And where a lady goes, a gentleman will follow. If a woman dressed in a well accessorized classic sheath with shoes that did not make her teeter like a transvestite in a nightclub show, gone too would be the jeans hanging off the behinds of baseball-capped, droopy t-shirted messes that so many young men adopt as something to be prized.
We need to value ourselves as people, not as objects to be flaunted with sexuality or kookiness being the most important aspect of one’s character aimed at inspiring interest. It does quite the opposite. When you look at the photo shoot Ascot did as a guide to their dress code, it was an ode to the great style and grace of the Richard Avedon age just before the sixties threw the world into chaos. Beautifully constructed clothing and colour that highlighted a woman’s (and man’s) natural beauty rather than a bawdy interpretation of their sexuality.
It is amazing how happy people become when rising to an occasion –even as simple as a party at home. I noticed this many times in my early days in London when the other half and I would throw a Black Tie event in our cramped little apartment on a shoe string budget. People loved it. Countless times I heard how it made them feel uplifted and looking forward to our dos.
Dressing the part gives us a sense of festivity. It lends a lightness and sense of occasion to an otherwise dreary world. It also means we have to have to take care of ourselves – a sort of inward focus of manners. Filling up on cupcakes and fries is easy when your wardrobe is loose t- shirts and elasticised waists. A fitted skirt or jacket dictates otherwise.
Sartorial style is very much about manners. And manners are all about consideration of “the other” and not the focus on ‘me’ and ‘my needs’. Would you wear a skirt cut up to your kidneys when visiting old granny or be sensitive to her values of modesty? Unfortunately the baby boomers seem to have created a generation that is obsessively focused on a superficial, vapid version of “me” and Ascot’s fashion police epitomise the futility of King Canute fighting against the unstoppable tide of self-indulgence.
