by arthur Weinreb, associate Editor,
February 9, 2004
america is a land of opportunity where anyone can grow up to be president. abraham Lincoln said it and Gerald Ford proved it. Ford wound up in the oval office having never run for election outside of the fifth congressional district in Michigan. He was appointed vice president by Richard Nixon after Spiro agnew resigned that position, returned to Maryland and pleaded nolo contendere to some fraud charges that had arisen while agnew was governor of that state. Ford assumed the presidency when Nixon resigned on august 10, 1974 in the wake of the Watergate scandal that would simply not go away.
Ford seemed like the most unlikeliest of leaders. His primary function as president in the first few months of his term was to restore the faith of the american people in their government--something that had been badly damaged by Nixon, Haldeman, Erlichman, Dean and Company. Ford had to show that the days of break-ins, payoffs and cover-ups were a thing of the past.
and President Ford admirably fulfilled that function of his presidency. Ford managed to convince americans that the excesses of Richard Nixon’s administration were a thing of the past because Ford simply did not appear bright enough to have pulled off the same type of things that Tricky Dicky did. Let’s face it--how can someone who can’t walk down a flight of stairs without falling, gets hit on the head with a golf ball and becomes a victim of an assassination attempt where the would-be assassin is a little hippy chick named "Squeaky", actually engage in conspiracies and cover-ups? He simply didn’t appear to be bright enough to do it.
Now there are certain differences between Ford and Paul Martin. Don’t look for the PM to fall down, fumble a football à la Bob Stanfield or get shot at by a "squeaky" (Martin can’t get shot at--we have a gun registry, you know). But none of these things take away from the fact that our new prime minister has certain Ford-like qualities.
When something goes wrong or allegations are made against Paul Martin, he has the ability to look into the camera or at the questioner with a stunned look on his face and deny that it had anything to do with him. and while he "ummms" and "awwwww"s and stammers and stutters, there is just no way that anyone could think that he could be in any way responsible for it. While his leadership team was busy restricting the sale of Liberal membership cards and gradually taking control of riding associations, Martin seemed completely detached. and it was so believable. Last September, when Martin learned of his lopsided first round victory against his lone opponent, Sheila "I’m nobody’s prime minister" Copps, Martin’s first reaction was to say, "Well, I’ll be." While Sheila was travelling the country speaking out against all things american, Paul was down on his farm doing an imitation of that great american icon, Pa Kettle.
Paul Martin also has the ability to use his looks and demeanour to avoid any responsibility for anything distasteful that took place under Jean Chrétien while he, Martin, was Minister of Finance. and when it turned out that Martin’s company, Canada Steamship Lines, received $161 million dollars from the federal government, $46 million of it while he was in cabinet, while earlier reports had put the amount at $137,000, Martin’s reaction was kind of, aww shucks, I didn’t know, maybe I was doing something else. Paul must have been out back at the farm--whittling with Pa Kettle.
Paul Martin is Gerald Ford to Chrétien’s Nixon. Like Nixon, Jean Chrétien would stonewall whenever he was accused of wrongdoing. Even through his constant denials, everyone knew that Jean had been behind it. There is no way the little guy from Shawinigan would ever let on that he was not in control of every aspect of his government. Chrétien liked to give the impression that he knew everything. Yet Paul Martin is happy to let the world know that not only is Kraft Dinner his favourite meal, but that he is totally incapable of making it.
as former Ontario premier Bill Davis proved, bland works. Paul Martin is setting out to prove that dumber works even better. and so far, he is succeeding.