Basking in the excitement generated by Iran's increasingly strident talk concerning its nuclear ambitions and Europe's growing jitters about the possibility of an atomically armed Islamist state, President Mahmoud ahmadinejad has announced plans to convene a conference in the near future to examine the scientific evidence necessary to disprove the existence of the Holocaust.
He is extremely concerned, it appears, about the myth of the Holocaust and its use as the foundation for the creation of the state of Israel by the allies at the end of World War II.
Whoa, Nellie, I guess he's a bit out of touch with the captured Nazi documents, personal recollections, reconnaissance photos, books and research that have been available since the end of the war, so I guess he's been in the dark about a few things as he begins to round up the participants for this bit of scurrilous horseplay.
Here are some statistics for you to contemplate, Mahmoud, from the actual archives captured from the Nazis, those precise and impeccable record keepers, and apply to the deaths of the poor unfortunates who simply ran afoul of the mobile SS murder squads (Einsatzgruppen), as they made their grisly way across Russia as part of the Holocaust which you're questioning.
From June of 1941 until the end of 1942, the four Einsatzgruppen, a, B, C and D, murdered some 739,000 Jews. Of course, these horrific numbers apply only to those actually counted in this process. In addition to these terrible operations, the Wehrmacht, locally recruited police auxiliaries, axis allies, and other anti-partisan units are responsible for another 600,000 deaths. That's people murdered behind the lines, Mahmoud, their bodies tossed into pits, thrown into ravines, all done, like the mass graves your neighbor Saddam is responsible for, outside of the concentration and death camp system.
The extermination camps are another matter altogether. and here again the numbers are absolutely staggering and indicate the scale and magnitude of the Nazi program for death and the extensive facilities required for such an enormous undertaking. This process consisted of a mechanized production line where the victims were removed from railroad cars and were marched directly to the changing rooms, then into the gas chambers, their bodies then moved to the crematoria, all operated by the Nazis and their SS minions, sometimes 24 hours a day, for years.
Some 600,000 Jews were put to death in Belzec, 250,000 more were done to death in Sobibor, 900,000 were gassed in Treblinka, and 60,000 were killed at Majdanek — all in the Lublin region of Poland. In Chelmno, near Posen, Poland, 152,000 suffered the same fate. Finally, at the mammoth site at auschwitz-Birkenau, where potassium cyanide gas was used on a massive scale, 1,100,000 unfortunates were done to death in that modern day industrial representation of Dante's Inferno.
The evidence for these unspeakable crimes is overwhelming, and decidedly not for the faint of heart, but I just don't think that Mahmoud, his paladins, and his team of traveling mullahs, including his conference attendees, will be hoofing it off to the Yad Vashem archives in Jerusalem, the Public Records Office in London, the Centre de Documentation Juive Contemporaine in Paris or the National archives in Washington D.C. anytime soon, to inspect the files, nor do I suspect they'll view the remains of the actual camps. after all, you wouldn't want any real documents, eye witness accounts, photos, the sworn depositions from the participants in the Nuremburg War Crimes Trails or the ruins of the camps to muddy the waters when you're on a witch hunt. Especially when you already have the final verdict in mind before you start the proceedings.
So, Mahmoud, what experts will you invite to this shindig to support your ideas of a myth?
Don't tell me, but I see an invite going out to Fred a. Leuchter, Jr., the one time uncrowned Mr. Death. He was the foremost expert on US execution paraphernalia until his moniker as an engineer was exposed as a sham and he was forced to surrender his title.
as part of the defense team for the trial of the neo-Nazi Canadian Holocaust denier, Ernst Zundel, Fred traveled to auschwitz in 1988 to perform some quick and dirty scientific tests on the concrete in the remains of one of the gas chambers and to render an "expert" opinion on whether such a facility of the scope and size of that extermination camp could have functioned as one.
Sadly, Fred's experimental "research" was dismissed and his testimony was tossed out due to its utter lack of credibility and its failure to meet any level of acceptable scientific rigor.
But Mahmoud, maybe Fred could hang around for awhile after the get together, do a bit of consulting for you and give you a hand on the execution end of things, especially if things get out of hand. They say he's a heck of a partier and has designed some superb lethal injection apparatus.
Then there's David Irving, the revisionist historian who's noted for seeing things through Hitler's eyes. Though not a scientist, he'd be a welcome addition to the throng and could give the Fuhrer's view on the Holocaust and could tell you in no uncertain terms that it didn't take place.
David's said to be quite the raconteur and would be a blast to watch one of your military parades with, especially if he's seeing everything as Rommel did that day.
another invitee on the list, I'll bet, and a confirmed attendee, at least until his sudden demise at the wrong end of a Hellfire missile while having a chat about the use of phosgene gas and other experimental weapons with his al-Qaeda cronies in a backwater village in Pakistan, would've been your old pal, al-Qaeda's science manager, abu Khabab al-Masri.
But in his revered absence, you could watch one of his home movies, including the one of his dogs being put down by the use of poison gas.
So, Mahmoud, how will you handle the Holocaust? I bet you just leave well enough alone, steer clear of the facts, keep the lid on the weird science and just party with the attendees. I'll also bet you have the report already written.
But I'd be wary of inviting any surviving Nazi experts to share the moment with you. The German word Gift means poison.
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