It has long been a foundation of the liberal philosophy that anyone with provable progressive credentials--of whatever educational achievement, whether or not they have ever served in the military, regardless of their ability to express their point of view effectively--makes them effete critics of every single verifiable aspect of military affairs, doctrines, strategy, tactical operations, weapons systems and lethality, personal protective systems, battle dress, ammunition, sleep wear, education, logistics, recreation, identification, communications, night vision systems, global positioning systems, electronic countermeasures, the efficacy of the battleship in today's battlefield, use of depleted uranium weapons and what have you.
However, on the flip side of the liberal coin, no one, absolutely not one soul from the conservative side of the aisle, may at any time, regardless of their own military achievements and education--taking into account the modest and paper thin report cards turned in by the likes of those failed reactionary “generals” like Washington, Jackson, Sam Houston, U.S. Grant, Pershing, a.a. Vandegrift, Macarthur, Eisenhower, Patton, Creighton abrams, Norman Schwartzkopf and Tommy Franks, which would already disqualify them from the slightest demurral--may ever be allowed to question the tiniest verb in the vast military encyclopedias acquired by the likes of John Kerry, Wes Clark, Ted Kennedy, Harry Reid, Tim Kaine, Jack Murtha, Russ Feingold, Dick Durbin or Sandy Berger. No, their vast array of knowledge and able application in the military arts sets them, and all other members of the national Democratic Party, above the slightest hint of criticism or question of patriotism. Only the Republicans may be so tarred and tarnished --the New York Times, CNN and Chris Matthews and the White House press corps tell us so.
There is a classic scene in the Bedford Incident, where the Doc, played with a terrific air of deliberate and passionate confusion by a perpetually addled Martin Balsam, decides to hold sick call and prepares the industrial sized jug of aspirin for the malingerers, misfits, cry babies, cranks, lay abouts and work shy who troubled the ships he served on in World War II, courtesy of the draft. When nobody shows up, he's quickly disabused of his addle-pated notions by the pharmacist's mate who, in no uncertain terms, advises him that he's serving in a new navy, where the sick, lame and lazy have no place and are no longer tolerated.
Recalling the excellent and steady flow of military troublemakers the Vietnam War dumped into their all inclusive laps, onto the front pages and into the dinner hour courtesy of TV, the liberals are looking for the same exalted and wonderful flow of deserters, fraggers, heroin addicts, psych problems, guys gone aWOL, soldiers being prosecuted for criminal violations--any fresh dirt will do to further their singular anti-Bush cause.
But so far, despite the fuss over abu Ghraib, the colonel who fired the pistol near a thug's head, the rumors of something really big coming up real soon, the alleged polls taken concerning the troops low morale, Jack Murtha's gasping mud slinging and the broken army death song, the continual broadcasting of the body count from store fronts to front pages, the anti-war demonstrations just haven't caught on with the same fervor as they did in the old Vietnam heyday--with the hundreds of thousands turning out to hear Hanoi Jane lie, John Kerry fib and watch the cheap white-face guerilla theater with the children's toys. Where, following their eventual adjournment, the demonstrators would retreat for the ceremonial smoking of doobies near the reflecting pool and hold pot addled discussions of how we really smashed the pigs this time around and man, we were really cooking today and, wow, Fonda's looking good, too.
But there just haven't been as many troubled vets and their stories of grief to rehash this time around. Like that famous Dan Rather fraud of sham of a story about the Viet vets living in the woods in the Pacific Northwest. a great story if you like pure fiction, as they turned out not to be either combat vets or vets at all, I forget the full depth of the perfidy old Dan pulled over us all in this gelastic attempt to show us the unvarnished truth. But he wasn't the only one lying about the veterans, as there were a whole bunch of guys all suited up in camouflage duds and boonie hats pretending to be the troubled vets he was lying to us about. I wonder if they're still living in the woods pantomiming, or if they've finally given the whole thing up when Dan finally surrendered and gotten haircuts and gone back to work?
Nope, it's time for some really desperate Democratic measures, especially now that Dan's retired, Mary Mapes is admitting her hopeless addiction to the further investigation of the homemade Texas home guard papers incident, Cindy Sheehan's losing traction and her mind and calling out in her tortured sleep for Hugo after injuring herself fighting with the cops, Hanoi Jane's out to lunch and equally out of touch, the Winter Soldiers are unavailable and are campaigning for increased SSI and an end to restrictions on medical marijuana use, Ted Kennedy's still in a bit of a funk after the failure of the alito torpedoes to explode and sink the poor man's good ship and Nancy Pelosi is calling for the investigation before the censure, the successful impeachment, and just before the victory lap to the hair parlor.
and so it is with the Democrats, the malevolently emphysematous Harry Reid and their latest game plan for the stunning mid-term election upset which they can all but taste, smell and feel, which, sadly and for no good reason, save for the embarrassment of the only truly decent party in american politics, has been leaked to Republican congressmen and to Rush Limbaugh.
So Harry Reid's plan--rather than waste time coming up with something that would smack of logical alternatives or of something original--is to round up folks who lost a relative in Iraq and beg them for photos in their yards or homes and get them on TV or in the local news, look for folks who have paid for body armor out of their own pockets and see if they can be lured into a big neighborhood press jamboree featuring colored lights, rummage through the various congressional districts for people who really don't like President Bush and get them to explain why in as many languages as possible and use al-Jazeera if they have a man in the area, rent loud speakers and affix them to panel trucks and motor around iffy neighborhoods with canned explanations of why Bush is “incompetent,” the new Democratic watch word, which is phasing out “scapegoat.” and, of course, keep trolling for the lowest common denominators in the military to exploit for use in the anti-war games, by asking the congressional folks to keep an eye out for vets who have been suffering as a result of their service and to send their names in to Harry for future use. So the whole Democratic plan is to fight Bush, with nothing else in the powder horn, and this is the big Democratic plan to seize power.
Unfortunately for the Democrats, they just don't understand that today's US military just doesn't have the same number of malingerers that the one in 1943 had. Today it's an all volunteer force, which means that the guardians of our country want to be out there, on the ramparts of our freedom in all kinds of weather at all hours, and are less prone to malingering and to going over the fence.
and regardless of what John Murtha, John Conyers, Harry Reid and Dick Durbin say, the US military is not broken. The only thing that's broken is the will of the Democrats, who would rather fight President Bush, because he's closer and it's easier to take a cab across town to fight before a ready microphone and a handy-cam, than it is taking on the real enemies of america, who have been known to be recalcitrant and problematic in a squabble and live in countries without a zip code or an adequate TV studio to mince around in.
But don't get caught asking about their strategy for the defense of our way of life or their priorities in this fight--not unless you've got five stars on your collar and thirteen rows of ribbons--and five stars went out with Omar Bradley in 1950. and even then that sort of thin shoddy one dimensional experience may not be enough to allow you to raise a timid hand at a New England town meeting with a question on national defense without a haughty mirthful retort from a strutting vainglorious Democratic expert and a quick investigation into whether you're a Republican interloper and voted for Bush.
They're just like the Doc--they completely fail to grasp the idea that things have changed, just as they fail to realize that this is a dirty world wide war-- which some have termed World War IV, after the Cold War--and not the easily containable court room antics of a renegade roughneck in a tough prosecution. The stakes are much higher and a real plan would be nice.
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