You read the words and you think of Slim Pickens, a B-52, Russian airspace, a befuddled Dmitri and the unplanned delivery of a thermonuclear weapon.
Today, however, there are more sinister forces at work, with the Democrats throwing all caution to the winds in their frontal assault on Mr. Bush in the heated scrum for Congress, and in the madcap pronouncements issuing from arlen Specter, who, it appears, is stepping in the vast hollow footprints of that premier privacy champion, Chuck Schumer.
and Mr Mahmoud ahmadinejad, Iran's zany president, is offering a growing panoply of threat warnings to Israel, with promises to eliminate it, among others, which are routinely mimicked by the happy go lucky members of Hamas, Hezbollah and the other terror groups plying the trading routes in the mid-East, and helping Chuck and arlen along.
Just last Sunday, a top Iranian foreign ministry spokesman advised the world that, "Nuclear research will continue. Suspension…is not on our agenda. The issue is irreversible."
Every time Iran cranks up the pressure on Israel, breaks out a new atomic brick bat, puts another nuclear scientist in the bullpen, tests a new weapons system, fires another hopped up cruise missile, puts on a classy parade with guys in green ball caps waving snazzy flags, explains that the Holocaust is a hoax, builds an expansive new research center, the price of oil goes up, up, up.
and when the cost of black gold increases, americans get excited. and when Joe Citizen is overwrought, shameless hucksters like Chuck Schumer and arlen Specter, who sit on the phone wires like chicken vultures looking for victims, like ambulance chasing lawyers finding a train load of unfortunates, swing into action.
although the motives attributable to Mr. Schumer are easily identifiable-- self-aggrandizement, the triumph of the appeasement party at the upcoming polls, the chance to swing a mean super-sized gavel in front of the kliegs, cameras and the helpless--the motives of Mr. Specter are less discernable.
Senator Schumer has already threatened to drag the oil companies before him, and make them dance, sing and explain why they are making a profit, after paying their capacious governmental share of taxes, of course. He has also warned them that he will subpoena their public documents, a totally empty gesture, but a fine example of his notorious grandstanding, flogging for fear.
However, the shower of mainstream media rain drenching his vacuous parlor games has served to raise public's burgeoning discomposure over the administrations inability to slow the trenchant price increase. and Mr. Schumer dearly loves a frightened man on the street, just as he enjoys stoking the fires of fractious foreboding, regardless of the damage caused or the factuality grounding his ceaseless onslaught.
Senator Specter, on the other hand, also giddy with the bad news from Iran, spouts his own special version of preposterous anti-capitalist tommyrot, indicating that he must be on easy street, with most of his money in a Roth IRa.
"But I think windfall profits, eliminating the anti-trust exemption, considering the excessive concentration of power are all things we ought to be addressing," he nattered the other day.
I'd turn a jaundiced blood-shot eye toward the US Senate long before I'd begin raking the oil companies over the red hot coals and poke them with white hot tongs in the excessive powers bill of attainder, with the senate's ability to trade stock on non-public information, take their war chests into private life, cushioned by a lucrative annuity.
Soon, Mr Specter will be chasing the farmers and their windfall in the upcoming ethanol fuel caper, cursing their congregation of influence and demanding their crops in tribute.
But the two boyos, thanks to the Iranian bomb threat, the fear it causes and the run up in oil prices, are driving america headlong toward the Democratic return to power.
So here we are.
Chuck Schumer, the Democratic Party and arlen Specter have learned to quit worrying and to love the Iranian bomb, and to embrace it.
If the Democrats sweep the House, they can both invite Mr. ahmadinejad to the party, where he can scramble the dinner line with Mr. Specter, and squat at the same table with Chuck.
They're as cozy as three MIRVs in a warhead.
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