By John Burtis
Friday, October 13, 2006
My, I was certainly taken aback when I saw that Grist Magazine's staff writer, Mr. David Roberts, is calling for "Nuremberg" style trials for global warming "deniers."
Grist, you see, is the latest hopped up hot house periodical to feature not only an interview with that rising global warming tsar, al Gore, but one with his close pal in the saddle, Bill Moyers, the darling of the PBS's pulp fictional genre. and Bill's conversazione is available in the current edition.
Mr. Roberts is totally incensed, it appears, that Exxon Mobil, for pity sakes, actually believes that the oil business is viable and, gasp, donates money to institutions supporting its views on energy. and, according to a panting Mr. Roberts, they operate just like the tobacco companies because they peddle an equally noxious and poisonous emission – carbon dioxide – a carcinogen if ever there was one. and carbon dioxide will kill you just as fast as the nasty death dealing chemicals found in tobacco and in those dreaded additives that make the death weed taste so doggone good, like chocolate.
Not satisfied with bawling, shouting, writing, blathering, and pushing people around, to say nothing of passing off Mr. Gore's impolitic pseudo-science as fantastically pure Einsteinian thought on full parade, save for the lack of that beautiful equation or two, David Roberts is now prepared to start up the show trials to begin the prosecution of those, like me I guess, who fail to fall for Mr. Gore's favorite personal and trite fictional theories on the global dissemination of hothouse gasses.
The "global warming deniers," those bastards, he says, must be tried.
No, to hook me on the Mr. Gore's 50 pound test line, I'd like a heartier and meatier dose of local stellar output, more on large inter-stellar molecular clouds, a further explanation of the earth's elliptical orbit, lunar effects, precessions in the earth's spinning on it's axis, a bit more on the angle of tilt, volcanoes and their own emissions, some methane ice inputs into the Gore equations, and the simple recognition that 10,000 years ago we were in an ice age and now we're not. Or maybe even a brief chat about the cyclic nature of previous ice ages and continental drift with a wild attribution on the Deccan and the Siberian traps tossed in for good measure.
But that's not going to happen. Not by a long shot. I'm a hard sell. But you either buy the theory hook, line, and sinker, or you're an infidel – just like Islam, without the prayers.
But all we get are calls for show trials, inquisitions, shouts of death for the non-believers and global warming deniers, and calls for miles of open pits for those who dared believe that man may not be totally at fault for all the planet's ills, change of habitats, and every extinction imaginable.
In the case of the environment, which has most of the wild eyed radicals of the left in a torch burning tirade calling for the blood of the heathen, it's time to move beyond Spain of the 15th century and the auto-da-Fe operations of that desperate Inquisition. Back then you were at least allowed to renounce your misdeeds and recant your sins without being put on public trial before you were burned at the stake, but not today.
Nope, currently, the radical environmentalists want to drag you right up front for a perfectly good show trial, preferably in front of those clowns on the 9th Circuit, in their peaked caps, eye masks, and long flowing black robes, no doubt, and have a good public go at you, with rocks, vegetables, and all, thrown by the believers, with immediate guilty verdicts all around.
To cleanse you of your apostasy, I'm sure the verdict will be a burning at the stake, as they did in the old days to the folks who didn't get behind the goings on, support the holy Inquisition, or who moved a bit too slowly in coming clean on their shabby beliefs.
and the global warming apostles of doom are everywhere. They're on TV, the radio, on the net, and in advertisements on Boston's MBTa busses. They have taken over honest discourse in once decent magazines like Smithsonian and National Geographic, who print all kinds of half baked slop to curry favor with the growing global warming crowd and the flat worlders.
"Hey," some bird will yell, "That road's flat." and Smithsonian will feature a lengthy think piece by Professor Doctor Ward Churchill supporting the notion that Kansas is completely flat, from end to end.
"My land, why, Mr. Churchill's a college professor," some planet warming tout will broadcast on CNN to add gravitas to the empty boasts contained in the article he's shilling for.
There are more good folks talking about global warming now than were talking about Kofi annan and his disdainful diatribes against slavery, usury, and the fluctuations hobbling the pound sterling a few short years ago, before he got religion and a big fat pension and began keeping mum on everything except Israel's shortcomings and my, how nice Hezbollah is looking today and where is my hand-made camel top coat.
But now it's time for some honest to goodness trials and executions for the bums who deny that global warming is completely, totally, and one hundred percent caused by people – big people, little people, and every Republican, and leave Kofi out of it all.
and pretty soon the trains will start running us out to where al Gore, John Kerry, Bill Moyers, and Mr. David Roberts think we should go after our rump proceedings are completed and to the slag heaps where we'll be shot.
Shoot me quick, Dave, I hate lines.
Oh, yes, if you can manage it, knock me off in June. I hear it's going to be a tough winter and it'll be tough to dig holes.
Don't believe me? ask Solzhenitsyn.
Global warming, you know.
Pursuant to Title 17 U.S.C. 107, other copyrighted work is provided for educational purposes, research, critical comment, or debate without profit or payment. If you wish to use copyrighted material from this site for your own purposes beyond the 'fair use' exception, you must obtain permission from the copyright owner. Views are those of authors and not necessarily those of Canada Free Press. Content is Copyright 1997-2024 the individual authors. Site Copyright 1997-2024 Canada Free Press.Com Privacy Statement