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Iggy returns -- as a "True Grit"

By arthur Weinreb, associate Editor,

Tuesday, august 15, 2006

Michael Ignatieff returned from his European vacation and almost immediately landed in hot water. after avoiding any comment on the Middle East war during his down time, Ignatieff told the Toronto Star that he was in favour of an immediate ceasefire, a UN international peacekeeping force and a buffer zone to separate Israel from Hezbollah in the south of Lebanon; you know the usual stuff. But when he was asked if the fact that he was now making a statement had anything to do with what happened in Qana (it didn't dammit — he didn't comment before because he was on vacation), Ignatieff replied, "It wasn't Qana. Qana was quite frankly inevitable in a situation in which you have rocket launchers within 100 yards of a civilian population. This is the nature of the war that's going on…This is the kind of dirty war you're in when you have to do this and I'm not losing sleep about that."

Uh oh! Israel kills some people during the war and you aren't losing any sleep over it. Michael, Michael — that's not the way to endear yourself to Liberal Party supporters. and no Liberal ever wants to hear that the killing of civilians by Israel of all countries is just something that happens, much like the election of Bob Rae from time to time just happens.

a few days later, Ignatieff said that what he said about Qana and the quality of his nightly repose was "a mistake". With the latter statement, Ignatieff has shown that he truly does have what it takes to become the head of Canada's Natural Governing Party.

What Michael Ignatieff said was nothing more than true Liberal Party doublespeak. What mistake did he make? Perhaps he did spend many a sleepless night worrying about those who died in Qana, returned to Canada and decided to lie about it. That would make him a true Grit — a solid member of the party that led the most corrupt and dishonest government in the history of Canada.

It is of course more likely that Ignatieff's original statement to the media; that given the way the war was fought, incidents like that which happened in Qana were inevitable and that he really didn't lose any sleep over it was the truth. Let's face it; it's hard to believe that there were any Liberal MPs who tossed and turned all night because of Qana. Ignatieff has finally learned that he has to lie if he ever wants to be the leader of the opposition, and more importantly, the next prime minister of Canada.

Unfortunately Michael Ignatieff, the great thinker, made the fatal mistake of thinking instead of reiterating the party line. He has to get with the program — and his admission that he had made "a mistake" shows that he is in fact doing just that. Rule No. 1 — Never say anything that could be construed as justifying anything that Israel does. Good Liberals are only allowed to utter the perfunctory, "Israel has a right to exist". Rule No. 2 — if you must "think", think about how many potential Muslim votes there are out there. There is no need to think about anything else.

In order to be a good Liberal, you have to show "compassion"; you have to show that you "care". Cold, hard analysis, no matter how accurate, simply won't cut it. Take a page from Bill Graham's playbook and talk about the wonderful social services that Hizbollah provides. Never mention the fact that the terrorist group (oops, the freedom fighters) were firing rockets into Israel from residential neighbourhoods.

So keep up those meaningless and ambiguous statements about being mistaken about not losing sleep over the incident in Qana. You just might have a shot at being the next prime minister of Canada.

and if you don't win the brass ring — well, let's face it; not too many Canadians will be losing any sleep over it.


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