Only fools think money solves all problems,” my lifelong best friend and mentor Jaybird told me. One day while lolling with my pals on Uptown Avenue in our Mississippi Delta hometown, I ignored Jaybird’s advice about money, and learned its truth the hard way. I didn’t have a cent, and was certain money could solve a problem: coming up with twenty-five cents to buy an All-Day Sucker at Peach-Eye’s Grocery.
As we meandered up and down Uptown, Billy Clyde “B.C.” Rakestraw, a scowling, ill-tempered old farmer blared his truck horn, scattering us from a parking place near the bank. Like most folks, Jaybird didn’t care much for Rakestraw, and warned me to steer clear of him. Rumor had it he was once was a happy, fun-loving guy until Billie Beth, his raven-haired, blue-eyed bride, ran off with a city slicker. After that, he took to drinking.
About that time, some older boys came along and dared us to let the air out of a tire on B.C.’s truck. When I sneered, “Put yo’ loot where yo’ lips is,” they sealed the wager by flipping me a quarter — just enough to buy an All-Day Sucker. After peeking in the bank and spotting B.C. haggling with a teller, I began deflating one of his tires. The old rattletrap truck was easing down when I heard what sounded like Judgment Day thunder.
“Gotcha, you little brat!” B.C.’s vitriolic visage was so close I smelled his chewing tobacco. The quarter in my pocket weighed a ton. Luckily, Aunt Murleen happened by and, seeing her nephew dangling from the handful of shirt collar Rakestraw had hold of, screeched, “B.C., put that boy down rat now!” The old reprobate obeyed.
A small crowd gathered, gawking and whispering, as Murleen and Billy Clyde discussed my fate. When the adults parted, Rakestraw did something nobody saw him do in years: He laughed. Aunt Murleen said, “Junior, B.C.’s running an errand, says you better have that tire blown back up before he returns.”
“But I ain’t got no pump.”
“Don’t need one, boy,” she replied, struggling to maintain her composure. “Don’t you know you can blow up tires with yo’ mouth?”
Directly, Rakestraw ambled back and looked down at an exhausted boy, blue in the face, puffing with all his might. A toothless grin broke across the old man’s unshaven, leathery face, as he fetched a hand pump from the truck, and guffawing, said, “Here, boy. I ain’t got time to wait all day while you blow up that tire with yo’ mouth.”
Later that day when I told Jaybird how Billy Clyde fooled me, he said, “Boy, occasionally everybody makes the mistake of allowing himself to be fooled, but mistakes are learning opportunities. Remember that old saying: ‘Fool me once, shame on you; fool me twice, shame on me.’ Then, he handed over an All-Day Sucker, hugged me, and said, “But only those who don’t learn from being fooled become what I know you aren’t: a fool fooled twice.”
Jimmy Reed is an Oxford, Mississippi resident, Ole Miss and Delta State University alumnus, Vietnam Era Army Veteran, former Mississippi Delta cotton farmer and ginner, author, and retired college teacher.
This story is a selection from Jimmy Reed’s latest book, entitled The Jaybird Tales.
Copies, including personalized autographs, can be reserved by notifying the author via email (.(JavaScript must be enabled to view this email address)).
Only fools think money solves all problems,” my lifelong best friend and mentor Jaybird told me. One day while lolling with my pals on Uptown Avenue in our Mississippi Delta hometown, I ignored Jaybird’s advice about money, and learned its truth the hard way. I didn’t have a cent, and was certain money could solve a problem: coming up with twenty-five cents to buy an All-Day Sucker at Peach-Eye’s Grocery.
As we meandered up and down Uptown, Billy Clyde “B.C.” Rakestraw, a scowling, ill-tempered old farmer blared his truck horn, scattering us from a parking place near the bank. Like most folks, Jaybird didn’t care much for Rakestraw, and warned me to steer clear of him. Rumor had it he was once was a happy, fun-loving guy until Billie Beth, his raven-haired, blue-eyed bride, ran off with a city slicker. After that, he took to drinking.
