WhatFinger

Prime Minister Stephen Harper sings

And now, Jack Layton, singing ‘Stairway to Heaven’



In a stunning political move, Prime Minister Stephen Harper scored a “game changer” on Saturday night when he wowed a National Arts Centre gala by playing the piano and belting out a Beatles tune.

When the surprising performance was over, the crowd, made up of artists who are typically hostile towards the Prime Minister, stood up in unison and chanted. “We want a grant, we want a grant.” A senior Conservative strategist later told the media, “We wanted to show the country that the Prime Minister wasn’t just a policy wonk, but a policy wonk who could play a musical instrument.” Caught off guard by the new Conservative strategy, the other parties are now scrambling to play catch up. Word has it that Liberal leader Michael Ignatieff will stand up in Question Period tomorrow, slip on a fedora, and croon the Leonard Cohen hit “Closing Time.” Meanwhile, NDP leader Jack Layton and the Bloc Quebecois’s Gilles Duceppe have joined forces to create a rock band called “The New Coalition.” “We are primarily going to be a Rolling Stones cover band,” explained Layton. “We will not allow the Prime Minister to corner the market on golden oldies. If anyone should represent 1960s attitudes it’s us.” In a related development, Elections Canada recently announced that Simon Cowell will determine the winner of the next Canadian election.

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Gerry Nicholls——

Gerry Nicholls is a Toronto writer and a senior fellow with the Democracy Institute. His web site is Making sense with Nicholls


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