Yesterday, Former National Security Council spokesman Tommy Vietor was interviewed on Fox News by Bret Baier. Baier pressed Vietor for details about his role in altering the Benghazi talking points used by Susan Rice on the Sunday morning news shows. Vietor, whose memory is apparently a Swiss cheese-like labyrinth of empty spaces initially claimed he didn't remember, because "Dude. This was like two years ago."
Now, I don't know if Vietor reads anything I write. I assume he doesn't. But, just in case he does, I want to be sure he'll be able to understand me. So the rest of this article will be in a language he can comprehend:
So, like dude. Yesterday, you went on the news thing and you totally screwed the pooch. It's, like, who goes on one of those shows and calls the host "dude" right? I mean, that is so lame.
Then, you tried to say you didn't remember 'cuz this happened "like two years ago" and this is, like, what you do all day or something? But then you turned around and said "no" when that other guy asked you "did you do that?" So, you obviously totally
do remember and you got caught lying. That. Is. Completely. Bogus.
Besides, if four people you actually cared about died, like, two years ago, wouldn't you still want to know why people were lying about what happened to them?
What's your damage? If your memory's so bad, maybe you should get tested. Or maybe you're, I dunno, in the wrong line of work or something.
Like all that wasn't bad enough, you made it even worser by saying "these are the most well understood and discussed talking points in the history of talking points." Like, if they're so well understood and discussed how come you don't know what you, y'know,
did to them? I mean, if you've been talking about them for two years, and your bosses totally tried to hide them, and they only got out cuz of a lawsuit, and then you were asked to be on a show, shouldn't you have boned up on it?
I mean, it's like you're not even taking this seriously because two years is a
way long time.
"#TBT." That's like that "Throwback Thursday" thing right? OMG! You're so funny. You're like funnier than my cousin, and he is
totes hilarious.
If I were you, I'd be so embarrassed that I'd like, get a bag of chips, go to my room, and stay in there listening to my One D record collection for like
forever.
