Politics of the bizarre

Bizarreness comes in many forms. In Canada it manifests itself in politics. Following the current election, which thankfully is nearly over, one can’t help but wonder what motivates a people whose politicians woo them with the promise of higher taxes or with a vague plan to break up the country. Where else but Canada can a political leader face sharp criticism from his rivals for remaining calm in a crisis?

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But that seems to set the tone for the political climate in this country. If one were to look at Canadian politics in a rational, dispassionate light, one could almost imagine that the campaign of the past month were some sort of spoof, maybe a comedy skit for Saturday Night Live. The Liberal Party of Canada is running on a platform of a massive tax increase that would add punitive levies to necessities such as home heating oil and fuels that supposedly enable us to deliver the fruits of our labors to the market place. Stephane Dion, the leader of the Liberal Party, whose command of the English language, which is used by 25 million Canadians, is so poor that he can barely make himself understood, is promising higher taxes that he claims will be “revenue neutral”. His campaign in essence promises to save the planet from certain destruction by arresting the current change in the globe’s climate through higher taxes, even though Canadians produce less than 2% of the world’s carbon emissions, which are thought to be responsible. The Green Party also promises higher taxes and promises to save the planet in similar fashion to that of the Liberal Party. Only difference is that the leader of the Green Party is a woman who is able to speak both official languages passably. The Green Party’s tax regimen, while similar to that of the Liberals is also different in that it promises an immediate tax increase of 12¢ per liter in the price of gasoline, which will then be increased to 24¢ per liter. The Green Party also advocates a “cap and trade” scheme for large emitters of CO2, such as steel and mining companies. This means that such companies would essentially have cough up money to people like Al Gore and Maurice Strong, both of whom are owners of carbon exchange brokerages, in order to stay in business. Jack Layton’s NDP is even more ambitious in their promise to raise taxes. The difference between the Greens, the Liberals and the NDP is that Jack promises to jack up taxes on corporate Canada and then give the money back to the people in the form of income tax cuts, much in the same way that Robert Mugabe took away land from wealthy farmers in Zimbabwe and gave it to his supporters. Like Elizabeth May, Layton also believes that large “polluters”, as he likes to call resource-based companies, should be forced to pay Al Gore and Maurice Strong for the privilege of staying in business. Layton is particularly incensed at both the Liberals and the Conservatives for allowing corporation to keep any of their profits, claiming that raising corporate taxes will actually create new jobs. Giles Duceppe, the leader of the Parti Quebecois, believes much of the same things that the Libs, the Greens and the NDP believe, except in addition he also wants to break up the country and turn Quebec into an independent nation. Given that Quebec’s ability to fend for itself is severely curtailed by policies that make it very difficult to do business in that province unless you happen to be born there (pure laine, I believe they call it) this will be a tall order. In fact getting industry established in Quebec has long been the third most important priority of Quebecers, right after ensuring no one is allowed to use a language other than French and sucking billions in unearned transfer payments out of English Canada. The Conservative Party of Canada, led by Stephen Harper, is probably the most bizarre party of the five. Having run on a platform of Conservative principles two years ago, the party won a minority government and then proceeded to enact many of the policies against which they had campaigned previously. Consequently, Canadians that are truly conservative do not have a lot of trust in Stephen Harper. To counter this distrust on the part of Canadian conservatives, the Party has displayed the leader in suits-sans tie and cardigan sweaters to make him appear more relaxed and trustworthy. This has actually worked against him as the opposition parties have accused Harper of all but being on Prozac, given how calm and relaxed he has appeared during the sub-prime meltdown in the U.S. Poll results seems to confirm that calmness in crisis is a political liability in Canada and the Libs are running ads calling attention to Harper’s calmness. To say that politics in Canada is bizarre is to actually understate how wacky it truly is. I think the Liberals put it best during the last election with their ads that claimed, “We’re not making this up”. It’s so weird that one would be hard-pressed to make it up. Happy Thanksgiving.