San Fran Gitmo

Some days the dots just jump up and connect themselves. Two articles appearing side by side on the front page of our local paper prove that. The editorial staff isn’t very bright so we have to assume it was coincidental but perfect symmetry none the less.

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The first article informs us that Californians are fleeing the state faster than new residents are moving in. We have seen a net loss of 144,000 residents between July 2007 and July 2008. However these figures may be understating the case as it fails to account for the number of illegal aliens returning to Mexico in disgust. As a side note New York and Michigan are also experiencing a mass exodus. Elect enough liberals and in addition to higher taxes you can always count on complete economic and social collapse. The over regulated Golden Nanny State now boasts the third highest unemployment rate in the nation but not to worry we won’t give up until we are Number One. Juxtaposed next to the obligatory blue collar working family packs up the pickup and gives up on the Promised Land story is an article about Obama’s plans to close Gitmo. These are problems that solve themselves! All we need to do is take the 248 innocent peaceniks currently detained at Gitmo and relocate them to California. I recommend San Francisco as the ideal destination. Liberals are forever yammering about “root causes” that drive these poor misguided souls to jihad; this is their chance to rehabilitate a few. And given the current exploding Muslim birth rates the state will repopulate itself in no time. Liberals in California love to demonstrate their great love and concern for the Little Guy by walling themselves off in gated communities. Thus the infrastructure is already in place for the Jjihadi Relocation Program. It should be a simple matter to tweak the gate passes so residents are kept in rather than out. Beyond the obvious benefits of keeping liberals and terrorists locked up this will give liberals the opportunity to redesign their communities to eliminate any thing that could, maybe, possibly ever be considered offensive to a Religion of Peacer. “Are your towels fluffy enough, Mohammed”? Oh my God! What did I just say? No, no, no! That was not a reference to wearing a towel on your head!
 Pious Muslims should really appreciate the wholesome lifestyles embraced by so many San Franciscans. Liberals in other states could participate in this important project by sponsoring a terrorist of their own, sort of like those Sally Struthers commercials urging us to sponsor a third world orphan. Libs should embrace this project. We’ve had to put up with their caterwauling for years about the horrific conditions at Gitmo from the runny béarnaise sauce to being forced to listen to loud rap music. For the record, my neighbor forces me to listen to loud rap music every day. My numerous phone calls to Human Rights Watch remain unreturned. A few suicide bombings at pool parties should be a small price to pay for liberating these gentle souls from that hell on earth where they enjoy three meals a day and the benefit of such assinitity as guards wearing gloves to handle their holy terrorism manual. We should however take care not to expect too much of liberals. History shows that liberals lack the ability to learn from history.