What to do (and not do) after a week of tragedies

Generalizations are dangerous and tend to increase the tension between citizens and police. We must wait for the facts and let the justice system work. It's not perfect, but it's a foundation of our civil society. There are bad apple cops and bad apple citizens. Some cops may use excessive force in a split second, and some citizens want to incite a confrontation for violence, because they incorrectly think it might ease some people's frustrations. Incited violence is never an answer to anything. A mouthy response or resisting arrest is no match for a gun. Senseless killings are no excuse for panic, outrage or "get back" retribution. They only increase the tensions in some communities between citizens and law enforcement officials, who are there to protect us in the first place. We can't change the past, but we can identify initiatives that might help us experience fewer of these heartbreaking tragedies.

Here are a few that I think would make a positive difference: Boosting training for law enforcement. Neutralizing a dangerous situation requires exceptional training. Most police officers have been properly trained, and are respectful and cautious. But anyone in a sensitive life-or-death situation faces difficult decisions, and this is where some re-enforcement of what that training could make a difference. Teach our sons, daughters, dads, moms, brothers, sisters, uncles, aunts and cousins that a mouth is no match for a gun. Follow law enforcement instructions first, and argue your rights later in court. It might save your life. There's a difference in life about how things ought to be and how they are. Resist the media narrative that tends to divide us. Violence and confrontations make the headlines. But you rarely get the whole story. All the things that happened to provoke the violence probably don’t even make the back page. So you may be angry, but if your anger is based on media accounts, it’s probably misdirected. Yes, our hearts hurt as a nation when we are the victims of heartless radical Islamic terror attacks – of which, we have seen a lot. But we hurt and cry when our own citizens kill one another for any reason.

Yes, it's easy to declare that violence of all kinds must stop. It's easy to declare that the targeted assault on black men must stop. It's easy to declare that black-on-black crime must stop. It's even easier to blame someone or a group for what happened, even before all the evidence is analyzed. But real healing and solutions must start in the minds and hearts of all of us, with citizens and law enforcement officials creating real communication, collaboration and coordination. Solutions do not come from sensationalized headlines that tend to divide us. And tragedies cannot be prevented through the lens of the media. And remember, evil cannot be legislated out of our society. Problems cannot be solved working on the wrong problems. Bad things will still happen, but we can experience less of them.