Hey criminals, you may not want to break in to Kid Rock’s house

Last Wednesday, rock star/rapper Kid Rock's security system photographed a man on crutches who was trying to break into his Michigan home. Friday night, Rock (whose real name is Robert Ritchie) posted a message to his webpage, along with images of the intruder and his van. Let's just say the guy's lucky that Kid Rock wasn't home at the time.

His website read:

"Thank God I was not on the property at the time of this attempted break in. I am an avid hunter and marksman and I will not hesitate to shoot anyone who has myself or family in fear for our lives. I take the invasion of my personal space very seriously regardless of who you are and YES, I do profile people. I am currently profiling any balding white male on crutches driving a white creeper van. Please contact the Oakland County Sheriff Tip Line with any information on this jackass. I am offering a $5k reward for any information leading to his arrest. Thank you in advance. Kid Rock"

It took less than 24 hours for police to arrest the suspect and impound his 1994 Ford Club Wagonvan, which he'd used to try and pry open Ritchie's security gates. The crook will be arraigned today. This should serve as a warning to future would-be celebrity robbers. Not all musicians are pasty little cowards who shrink in fear at the sight of a gun. Some of them are actually willing to defend themselves and their families. Since stars that campaign for Republicans are probably more apt to fall into this category, thieves may find they have better luck out in Hollywood. Congratulations to Kid Rock for being one of the few famous people not afraid to protect their property and their 2nd Amendment rights.

Robert Laurie——Bio and Archives

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