Rick Santorum announces doomed presidential bid in interview with pretend journalist

I may give Bernie Sanders a lot of flak for being unelectable, but I don't want anyone to think Democrats have the market cornered when it comes to candidates with no chance of winning. Though he hasn't announced, we assume Jeb Bush is going to seek the Republican nomination, and the party already has Mike Huckabee in the race. Now, it will have to deal with a doomed Rick Santorum candidacy as well. Santorum made his announcement in a televised interview with pretend journalist George Stephanopoulos, and you can watch the clip below. To quickly sum it up, he's angling to re-fight the values-and-morality campaign that failed him in 2008, and will have even less traction this time around.

....And that's about it. Does he bring anything to the table that hasn't already been rejected? Nope. Has he modified his message to appeal to a country that appears desperate for a true, small government, constitutionalist? Nope. Did he do anything in the years since 2008 that would give you a new reason to vote for him? Nope. It's simply a re-run. Honestly, in an election cycle that's shaping up to be a battle of youth versus the Democrats' elderly, achievement-free, throwback candidate, I'm starting to wonder why every GOP throwback candidate feels they need to enter the race. Perhaps they're making a desperate bid to remind people that they still exist. It could be that we're simply watching a giant game of "me too" played by people who are terrified of being "left out." Maybe it's that they each have an army of yes men telling them they actually have a prayer of winning, when in reality they'll just cannibalize each other and steal time from candidates who could genuinely go the distance. Whatever the reason, the GOP is quickly transitioning from its previous status as a party with a "deep bench" to one boasting a litany of antiquated failures who don't know when to walk away. I mean, George Pataki? Someone, please, tell these people to knock it off.
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