WhatFinger

Obama, Julia, Composite Girlfriend

A Tale of Two Women



It's not often that a man can have two important women in his life — besides his wife. But then again, president Barack Obama is not an ordinary man. He is a man whose narcissism is so overwhelming that he can't imagine how genuinely creepy — and utterly dishonest — these two women make him appear. Who are these women? Only one has a name: Julia. The other woman? Let's call her exactly who she is: Ms. Composite Girlfriend (CG).
Now understand, just because Julia has a name it doesn't make her any more genuine than CG. In fact she is composite in her own right, a cartoon figure starring in an Obama re-election campaign slide-show designed to show that Julia's life — and the lives of the countless other American women she ostensibly represents — would be an utter disaster should she dare to sever herself from the most important relationship in her life. Julia's main squeeze? Big government. One so all-encompassing that Julia's life can only be meaningful and fulfilling if she surrenders her entire existence to it. It begins with her enrollment in Head Start: "Because of steps President Obama has taken to improve programs like this one, Julia joins thousands of students across the country who will start kindergarten ready to learn and succeed." At age 17 Julia's "on track" because her high school "is part of the Race to the Top program, implemented by President Obama." At age 18, "Julia and her family qualify for President Obama's American Opportunity Tax Credit — worth up to $10,000 over four years. Julia is also one of millions of students who receive a Pell Grant to help put a college education within reach."

At age 22, "Julia undergoes surgery. It is thankfully covered by her insurance due to a provision in health care reform that lets her stay on her parents' coverage until she turns 26." A year later, "Julia is one of millions of women across the country who knows she'll always be able to stand up for her right to equal pay. She starts her career as a web designer." At 25, "Julia's federal student loans are more manageable since President Obama capped income-based federal student loan payments and kept interest rates low. She makes her payments on time every month, keeping her on track to repay her student loans." By age 27, "Julia has worked full-time as a web designer. Thanks to Obamacare, her health insurance is required to cover birth control and preventive care, letting Julia focus on her work rather than worry about her health." At 31, "Julia decides to have a child. Throughout her pregnancy, she benefits from maternal checkups, prenatal care, and free screenings under health care reform." When she is 37, "Julia's son Zachary starts kindergarten. The public schools in their neighborhood have better facilities and great teachers because of President Obama's investments in education and programs like Race to the Top." At age 42, "Julia starts her own web business. She qualifies for a Small Business Administration loan, giving her the money she needs to invest in her business. President Obama's tax cuts for small businesses like Julia's help her to get started. She's able to hire employees, creating new jobs in her town and helping to grow the local economy." At age 65, "Julia enrolls in Medicare, helping her to afford preventive care and the prescription drugs she needs." We last hear of Julia when she's 67. "Julia retires. After years of contributing to Social Security, she receives monthly benefits that help her retire comfortably, without worrying that she'll run out of savings. This allows her to volunteer at a community garden." I don't know what's creepier. The idea that Julia owes her entire life to government beneficence — or that Barack Obama is an integral part Julia's life from the time she's a small child until at least age 42. Last time I checked, the Constitution limits a president to two terms. And then there are the inconvenient facts. Like the fact that Head Start has demonstrated no useful improvement in a child's educational future. The fact that our public schools have become an international embarrassment. The fact that Obamacare may be declared un-Constitutional, or the fact that this administration has a miserable record of job creation — or the fact that funds underwriting Julia's retirement and medical expenses won't be there because the trajectory of the Obama administration's current spending habits leads inexorably to national bankruptcy. As for Julia's fatherless child? He'll likely end up living in mom's basement playing computer games, when he's not busy demonstrating against the capitalist one percent — like his mom — who are making his life a living hell. Creepy, creepy, creepy. On to Composite Girlfriend. CG was a character from the president's 1995 memoir, Dreams from My Father. Progressives are very angry that some folks finally noticed — as opposed to noticing in 2008 — that the president, in a book ostensibly about his life, decided to combine several women into one Composite Girlfriend, to "move the narrative along," as it were. Obama's defenders note that such a construct is OK because the president owned up to it in the forward of his book. I'm in complete agreement with them — provided they and the president make important concession: in what universe does a book being promoted as non-fiction contain a fictional character? Mr. Obama is certainly entitled to write any kind of book he chooses. What he is not entitled to do is run roughshod over some pretty clear-cut definitions separating non-fiction, aka facts, from fiction. There is another clear-cut definition for such an effort. It's called "lying," and lying is something this president does with an almost pathological ease. And once an "autobiography" has been tainted by one lie, the obvious question arises: how many more lies does the book contain? What other parts of the story have been "enhanced" to "move the narrative along?" Considering the state of our mainstream media, I don't expect answers to such questions. The intrepid members of our Fourth Estate have made it more than clear that a little "embellishment" for the cause — like touting a lower unemployment rate that's only lower because millions of Americans have given up looking for work — is a small price to pay, if it gets a narcissistic prevaricator another four years in the Oval Office. And if a couple of fictional women can help, why not?

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Arnold Ahlert——

Arnold Ahlert was an op-ed columist with the NY Post for eight years.


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