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I am pleased to announce my intention to—and this is somewhat of a scoop—my intention to run for a fourth term as President of the United States…

President Trump: “When I’m gone, you’re all going to be broke. Your business model is going to be finished…


 That’s why tonight, to show how much I care about the press and I want to save your ratings, I won 3 times, now I’m going to do it again.” *Puts on ‘Trump 2028 Hat*

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