Oh Canada, America's Fifty-First State?

Trump has been talking “Canada, Join Us Now” because he wants smarter trade deals, stronger economic union, better national security policy, plus the removal of the Chinese Communist Party, whom Liberal leader and former prime minister Justin Trudeau lauded with fulsome praise).

Let’s put aside Trump’s “Art of the Deal” machinations. Canada, as the Fifty-First state, has a nice ring to it. Our Founding Fathers and their immediate successors certainly wanted Canada to join the American union. The War of 1812 not only centered on defeating the final abuses of the British, but fulfilling designs on bringing the Rest of British North America into the United States! We burned their parliament in Toronto, and the British returned the favor by burning the White House. Oh say, can you see where I’m going with all this?

Do we really want the Great White North to be the 51st State?

Congressmen, pundits, and general conservative activists have shared their concerns about the “Canada 51) proposal. The New York Times pointed out that Canadian America would create a more Democratic America. One hypothetical Electoral College map, merging all ten provinces of Canada into one state, Trump would still have won, but by slimmer margins. The House of Representatives would go blue, and the US Senate, though still red, would go bluer. So many Canadians believe everything from the government-owned corporate media. And they hate Trump.

I do like the idea, but the implementation of the vision needs some work. Canadians are not Americans, and there’s a lot we need to know about them and their (physically) great country.

A serious consideration: our Great White Northern neighbor is freezing into a new type of dystopia. Justin Trudeau, as their most notorious prime minister, waged a war on life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness. His tenure, marred so much by narcissistic tyranny, induced members of the European parliament to turn on him, denouncing him as a dictator.

Ask the truckers, ask the small businesses, ask Pastor Art Pawlowski of Calgary, Alberta: Canada is a frozen banana republic, the picture of a former British colony that was granted its independence, which adopted the Anglo-American legal tradition, but embraced big government statism as the answer to all of man’s problems. Add to this mess a lack of a freedom-oriented civic culture, and you have a recipe for a Maple Syrup political miasma.

But there are many truly conservative Canadians, some born or raised in the United States for some time, who welcome annexation and integration into the United States.

Can anyone blame them?

1. Everything is more expensive in Canada. From the phone bills to car insurance, to fuel to health care, the cost of everything is just too damn high!
2. Canadians do not have rights—or at least, the way that Americans have rights. The Charter of Rights and Freedoms establishes a “reasonable limits” clause which has allowed the federal and provincial governments to run roughshod over every citizens’ natural rights. Canada also has Stalinist “Human Rights Tribunals” which operate with the same force as any other court of law in Canada. Say something mean (but true) about the LGBT agenda, you can be dragged before the tribunal. If you criticize Islam or deny the Holocaust, you could be charged with a hate crime!

3. The Canadian system of government is a caricature of what any constitutional republic or democracy should be. The system all but permits a Canadian prime minister to serve as dictator. He gets to unilaterally appoint executive cabinet positions. He appoints the members of the Canadian Senate (yes, Canada's federal government does have a bicameral legislature). The prime minister can unilaterally dissolve parliament at opportune moments to secure another election victory, and he can unilaterally prorogue parliament as he sees fit. Trudeau has done both, no checks and no balance.
4. I mentioned the flimsy Charter of Rights and Freedoms above, but let me focus on a specific natural right unnaturally targeted and suppressed in Canada: the right to keep and bear arms. When faux-filmmaker Michael Moore released his vapid crockumentary Bowling for Columbine, he gave the impression that Canada was just awash with guns and everyone is free to hunt to their hearts’ content. Total lie! Gun control is severe, and use of firearms, even to protect yourself from crimes, could get you in hot water (or a frozen river). Former Prime Minister Justin Trudeau ordered the seizure of numerous types of firearms from all Canadians, too. Who wants that, eh?

Canada is not a free country, at least not in any discernible sense. People who have not been free need to get used to freedom. Canadians would need to become Americanized before they became Americans. Provincial governments would have to start adopting our Bill of Rights, which allows no limitations on what the government thinks is “reasonable.” Alberta is working on something like this right now! Freedom of speech means no more “human rights tribunals.” Canadians would have to get used to people owning guns and being able to carry them in public.

Following some initial Canadian-American salutary neglect, followed by a rapid dismantling of socialized medicine, energy, housing (just about everything), and the United States could enfranchise the provinces to become member-states of the United States.

On a side note, there’s the Quebec question. Sacré bleu, the last thing we need is another official language! This long-standing Canadian political problem could be solved easily: let Quebec become its own country, and the rest of Canada could join the U.S. of A, eh!