Vicious, Vindictive Virgilene’s Mean

Alice was not attractive, mainly because her front teeth poked out between her lips. Victor not only called her Virgilene but also made fun of those teeth. They played together often and got along until Victor started teasing her.

One day, Victor was being particularly hurtful and kept calling her Virgilene over and over again. Furious, Alice shrieked, “I’m Alice. Quit calling me that!” Then her mean playmate uttered these insulting words: “With them chompers, you could eat corn on the cob through a fence.”

Bursting into tears, Alice ran home. When she told her mother what Victor said, Mrs. Vaughn talked to his mother, and they decided their children could no longer play together.

As time went by, Victor began to miss his playmate, so he had a talk with his mother, hoping she could tell him what to do to make things right. Mrs. Valentino warned her son, “You better quit picking on Alice. Some girls have a mean streak in them, and I think she does. If you keep teasing her, someday you will find out the hard way that she can be mean. Go talk to her mother and promise that you youngsters will devise a plan to prove that you can get along.”

Victor did just that. With Alice and the two mothers listening, he said, “Mrs. Vaughn, I promise that from now on, I will call your daughter Alice, and to prove that I am sincere, I will put my teeth on her nose, but I promise not to bite. Then she can do the same to me. That will prove that we can get along.” Alice’s mom agreed, and so did her daughter.

With both moms watching, Victor placed his teeth across the bridge of Alice’s nose but did not bite. “See,” he said. “As promised, I did not bite Virgilene.” Oops! He accidentally used that awful name but did not realize that he had done so. Then he submitted his nose to the girl he should have called Alice.

Gently, she placed those dagger dentures on his nose--and bit down with all her might! Screaming for help, Victor shouted, “Aaaaaaaaaaagh! Get her off! Get her off!”

Finally, she removed her teeth and, glaring at Victor with a smirk of supreme satisfaction, said, “Mother, punish me however you wish--it was worth it.” Later, when Victor talked to his mother about what happened, she said, “You should have listened to what I told you: Vicious, vindictive Virgilene’s mean.”

NOTE: Jimmy Reed is a retired college professor and author of several books. This story is from his latest, a children’s book entitled FROM A TO Z, TO YOU FROM ME. Each story in the book maximizes the use of an alphabetical letter, enhanced by alliteration and assonance. The book is available on Amazon, or can be purchased directly from the author. His email address is jimmycecilreedjr@gmail.com