Obama Resolves the Republican Debates

Hearing brilliant, accomplished professionals from several fields forcefully debate who can best achieve America's conservative goals makes each Republican candidate a treasure.

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One shines out as the best president but they should all be fully engaged on a long-term basis in freeing the soul of mankind from the collectivist nightmare currently strangling America. How can we keep them all working to conquer evil and promote good? The answer comes from Obama: a Republican President and his conservative Czars. Jon Huntsman would make an excellent Press Czar: he knows the buzz phrases, looks great and is politically ambitious enough to reinstate the Reagan press conference. And he deserves something for having thrown in with the conservatives when he could have continued in the good graces of the Obama administration. As Press Czar, not just Press Secretary, he would be in the bull pen for the leadership position he seeks.

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Newt Gingrich would be the Political Strategy Czar, or Vice President, using his brains, experience and religious zeal for the rights of the individual to organize conservative forces and battle all collectivists to political annihilation. Imagine him unleashed; imagine him next in line for the presidency. Michele Bachmann would be the Federal Social Services Czar, in charge of all entitlement programs and any other federal attempt to legislate morality. With her decades of legal experience she would know the exact procedures to eliminate all programs her foster mother "sixth sense" told her were ineffective or harmful. Lord help anyone who got in the way of this driven, empowered lady and mother, a protector and motivator of youth beyond the imagining of Liberal Democrats and their Workers' Paradise. Ron Paul would be the Czar of Constitutionality. Though a little cranky, he would be in the constant presence of the President monitoring and commenting on every political move. The President would be of such strength of character he could put Czar Paul in his place when necessary without hurting anyone's feelings. Mitt Romney would be the Business Economics Czar, tasked with representing America’s business interests all over the world and channeling to the President the best ways to stay out of the way of free enterprise, always ready to enforce his code of ethics. He has successful experience in both political and business worlds; using his talents and reputation to communicate between them would facilitate the economy while lifting him above the storms of decision making. This would add another layer of Teflon to Gov. Romney which would serve him well in his political future. Rick Perry would be the Czar of the Southwest. After all the debate, his main strength is his Texanness. That's all Americans really know about him--he's a conservative Republican from Texas despite his confusion on some subjects, and Americans like their cowboys. He can fight it out on the border, use that ruggedness to resolve difficult problems and defend America. Rick Santorum would be the Czar of Decency--there's something basically decent in the man that even political opponents admire, giving him elections even when his party is in the minority. He's not afraid to interrupt in the cause of decency, which seems counterintuitive, but he interrupts so decently, with such a warming smile that his brand of rudeness is sort of welcomed. His presence would be required in both houses of Congress on a constant basis, or he might have an office filled with surveillance monitors to ensure that all federal officials are behaving decently. If they did not respond satisfactorily to his admonitions, he could threaten to refer them to the President. The President, of course, is Herman Cain. Mr. Cain has more strength of character, more insight into the human condition than the rest of the candidates combined, excepting, perhaps, Mrs. Bachmann. Mrs. Bachmann stands alone in her feminine strength, something men cannot hope to equal, but America is about to face one of the fiercest tests of history, that of the weakened, wounded former leader of nations among young lions, and Herman Cain is the only candidate to have personally survived such a struggle and come out on top. The other candidates, and many Americans, can't appreciate the inner strength this requires. Mr. Cain grew up in segregated America before the Civil Rights Movement, when children were told to accept the status quo. He not only turned that world upside down, but came out an even greater champion of humility and decency than other victors in that cause, eschewing the entitlement mentality and racist politics. His faith in God and basic American rules of common decency are unusually strong, taught by family then internalized through harsh experience. This ardor in his business ethics, the old ways of well-organized hard work and dealing in good faith, gives him the strength to prune out those individuals who don't fit his style then face a heartless enemy. And he has the honesty to admit his ignorance, the first step to wisdom. Sooner than we think, we will be challenged on all sides. A president from the privileged classes, or familiar with politics as usual, will fold under that pressure. Herman Cain will not. The steel in this man will only be appreciated at that time. Richard B. Jones is a bilingual probation officer, migrant teacher and welfare worker in rural West Texas; he has lived and worked in many places including China and the Middle East. His blog is: TheCaprock.com

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