John Lillpop

Speaker Pelosi Addresses Obesity Versus Hunger in America

--Satire-- Immediately after engineering the non-binding resolution on the floor of the U.S. House that provided victory for al-Qaeda, Speaker Pelosi boarded a commercial flight bound for San Francisco.

Sit Down and Shut Up, Hillary Clinton!

For damn near 17 years, the American people have stood by helplessly while being forced to witness non-stop exaggerations, deception, distortion, and scandals perpetrated by one Hillary Rodham Clinton.

John McCain, Illegal Aliens, and God

From his bag of tricks for converting right-thinking conservatives into Republican leftists, John McCain has injected God, love, and compassion into the non-stop wrangling about amnesty for as many as 38 million illegal aliens.

A Reasonable Plan for Dealing With Illegal Aliens

Mr. President, Honorable Members of Congress: Because our government has refused to secure America's borders and enforce our immigration laws, our nation is struggling to deal with as many as 38 million illegal aliens who have entered this great nation unlawfully.

McCain Meltdown Madness: Ignoring Existing Immigration Laws

As Senator John McCain slips further and further into the grips of neurotic self-delusion, his arguments in favor of legalizing 38 million illegal aliens becomes more and more specious.

Decline of the Ham Sandwich: Precursor to Armageddon?

--Satire-- Although my formal education in theology is negligible (zero), I am spiritually enlightened enough to know that the Almighty uses "signs" to warn his flocks of impending doom.

America Must Not Forget Mary Jo Kopechne

As news of Ted Kennedy's malignant tumor was made public, prominent people from all across the nation, including President Bush, Senator Robert Bird, and others, expressed shock, grief, and deep sorrow at the fate that has befallen the senator from Massachusetts.

Why Did These Liberals Lie About Weapons of Mass Destruction?

As the war in Iraq becomes more unpopular with an increasing number of Americans, Democrats in collusion with the liberal mainstream media, continue to politicize the war by blatantly distorting the facts.

Arnold Seeks to Use Lottery, Gay Marriage to Balance California Budget

Give California Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger some credit. (Just don't grant credit to the state of California!)

Liberalism Run Amuck: Gasoline Tops $4 Per Gallon!

America’s inability to free itself from dependence on oil from the Middle East may go down as one of the greatest failures in U.S. political history. Even the most generous historian will find it difficult to justify our continued reliance on a region of the world that has been in constant turmoil for 50 years. History, if chronciled honestly, will note that the Democrat Party adamantly opposed measures that would increase the supply of oil.

Mexico’s High-Technology Solution to Illegal Immigration

"Mexico to use biochip to control illegal immigration," screamed the headline at earthtimes.org late last year. Without reading the small print, one could be lulled into assuming that our third-world neighbors were finally getting the message:

Hillary Who?

In what is shaping up as a most dreary election season for conservatives, there is one ray of sunshine, one nugget of good news with which to take solace: The brutal pummeling of Hillary Rodham Clinton.

Beware Liberals in Republican Clothing

Dooms day prognosticators are warning of dire circumstances should Americans elect either Barack Obama or Hillary Clinton, or any combination thereof.

Woman Who Exposed Child Pornographer Bernie Ward Speaks

Bernie Ward, ultra-leftist, former Catholic Priest, former talk show host, and the "Lion of the Left," in San Francisco will get a taste of justice. This hypocritical pervert will spend five years in a federal prision for outrageous felonies involving child pornography.

Why the US Postal Service Always Loses Money!

As any regular customer of the US Postal Service (USPS) knows, the USPS is digging deeper and deeper into the pockets of Americans. As of May 12, the price for a first class stamp increased to $.42, a one penny increase.

Howard Dean’s Folly

Do leaders of the Democrat National Committee (DNC) actually expect the American people to believe that their party has the wherewithal to manage the most powerful nation of earth, when that same party is apparently unable to manage a simple system of pre-election primaries?

If Hillary Is Elected—

--Satire-- Should the American people be foolish enough to elect Hillary Clinton to the presidency in 2008, the following events will surely ensue:

Does the Rule of Law Still Matter at All in America?

Michael Mukasey United States Attorney General Washington, D.C.

Former Leftist Talk Show Host, Child Pornographer Headed to Slammer!

Bernie Ward, once known as the "Lion of the Left" for his insane blathering as a leftist talk show host in San Francisco, will roar no more, at least not among civil folk.

Breaking News: Hi-Technology Anti-Hillary Filter Now Available!

--Satire-- While the United States Congress may eventually prohibit water boarding as an interrogation technique, there is an inexpensive, legal, and ethical way to root the truth out of reticent jihadists.