William Bedford

WHEN APRILCOMES

April blows and April snows it also shines and showers April is nature’s opening act for spring’s big show of flowers.

The Good Old Days

There are those who will say that Margaret Wente's rant against her washing machine is proof that the Luddites are always with us. However, every technological advance is abhorred by someone or other. It's my belief that one of the greatest blows to civilization was the introduction of the washing machine.

Genetics

I wouldn't buy a GM auto because I don't want a car that's been Genetically Modified.

OLYMPIC FACES

Admittedly, we went a little overboard celebrating the surprising victories of Canadian athletes in the "Own the Podium." Vancouver Olympics. But then who ever thought we'd see the day when Canada would garner more Olympic gold medals than the U.S. and Russia combined?

Let us vow to keep “Our Inner Olympic Flame” lighting our way

Those of us who remember the mass euphoria generated by Expo 67 and the early reign of Pierre E. Trudeau must have had a feeling of De-ja-vue during the recent, most wonderful Olympic Games ever for Canada.

SPRING BREAK

THE SOUND OF CRACKLING ICE ECHOES ACROSS RIVERS AND LAKES,

The time has come for a kid-safe hotdog

I see where there's a move afoot to reconfigure the hotdog because, in its traditional shape, it presents a choking hazard to small children.

HOLY HOGTOWN NO MORE

The Sunday-curfew often tolled mid-game in the old baseball stadium by the bay because old Hogtown frowned on fun and games especially on the Sabbath Day.

OLYMPICS

WINNERS ALL! THEY SKATED, SKIED, DANCED AND CURLED

An Idea for Waste Disposal

It seems that the main obstacle to the widespread adoption of nuclear energy is the potential danger of nuclear waste which, currently, there is no way to dispose of safely.

MONKEY BUSINESS

Whoever decided to hold the June 26/27th G20 summit in the Metro Toronto Convention Center must have forgotten to take his meds.

Al Gore Snow Job

I hear Al Gore's scheduled speech on global warming in Washington last week was snowed- out, instead of sold-out.

WINTER-KIDS

SNOW BUNNIES THE PRISTINE SNOW GLITTERS IN THE PALE SUNLIGHT, ROSY CHEEKS AND HAPPY SHRIEKS AS SNOWBALLS FLY.

The G7 BS

While the reality challenged among us might believe the G7 summit is all about fixing the global economy, the rest of us, cynics that we are, know that the G7 bon-vivants love their annual shindig, where the hardest thing they have to do is look sober for the media while they spout bullxxxx in all directions.

Bad Seeds Disgrace Only Themselves

I keep hearing that Colonel Russell Williams has disgraced the Canadian military. Even General Walter Natynczyk (Canada's top soldier) says the arrest of Williams on murder charges feels like a "body blow."

Not Ordinary Criminals

Only in the U.S. would there be such agonizing over where terrorists should be tried and how they should be punished.

Bloody Sport

LIKE VULTURES, THEY FORM A CIRCLE IN THE SUN TO WATCH THE DANSE-MACABRE THAT THEY CALL FUN THEY JUMP FOR JOY AND SCREAM OLE!

The Heart of the Matter

The February moon shines polar- cold amid a blizzard of icicle stars, while the cheer of Christmas past is but a memory and the sunny rays of spring are still far off.

The Pernicious Preacher

The "Reverend" Pat Robertson, business-tycoon, erstwhile faith-healer and U.S. presidential candidate, tells us that God has abandoned the Haitian people, who have only themselves to blame for the earthquake because their ancestors made a "pact with the Devil."

Sleeping on the job

According to the latest statistics,