Easter Seggquester Avoided! Egypt and United States Announce Eggs for Tanks Agreement

- Satire Stoos Views’ Ace Reporter Hugh Betcha “Sixteen F-16s and 200 Abrams tanks will be given to the radical Muslim Brotherhood-led Egyptian government before the end of the year under a foreign aid agreement deal signed in 2010.” 
“White House threatens to cancel Easter Egg Roll for lack of funding.”

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In an exclusive interview with Stoos Views’ Ace Reporter Hugh Betcha, Mohammed Morsi, leader of the extremist Muslim Brotherhood, who famously denounced Obama as a “liar” and Jews as “apes and pigs” [sic], and now heads the Egyptian government, announced an Eggs for Tanks agreement between the United States and Egypt which will avoid the threatened cancellation of the traditional White House Easter Egg Roll this spring. “Even though we do not celebrate your “Easter” the Egyptian people are so appreciative of your country’s gift of tanks and planes, that the least we could do is donate some eggs and coloring kits so that the children can celebrate the Egg Roll this year,” Morsi explained to the reporter. Asked to explain his country’s generous offer of thirty dozen eggs and fifty Paas Easter Egg Coloring Kits to the White House, Morsi noted: “We read in the papers how your President was considering cancellation of the White House Easter Egg Roll this year as a result of the sequester, and we felt sorry for the children. It is the least we can do. We have a long tradition in Egypt of gift giving. In light of the gift of $250 million in military equipment (which we promise not to use on the apes and pigs in Israel) from your government, we felt it was only fair to return the favor. The eggs and coloring kits seemed like a fair trade and one that will help your country balance its budget and avoid such brutal sequester measures as canceling the Egg Roll.” “Would you consider taking one less F-16 so the White House can also afford to give tours for the next fifty years?” Hugh asked. “We have discussed this with your President, but he insisted that ‘a promise is a promise.’ He has his priorities--the kids can wait for a few more years.” Copyright © 2013 William Kevin Stoos for Canada Free Press